The Goals

Okay so here I am. January 1st and ready to commit. The last year I have come a long way. Making changes in my life and proud to say 15lbs lighter ๐Ÿ˜

I began following a website called (go one-click on the link – i know this means you may not come back here๐Ÿ˜‚). This team has changed my life. It’s called HIGH INTENSITY INTERVAL TRAINING (HIIT). The trainer that really inspired me is Lisamarie. Please check them out. These workouts are completely free and anyone can do them.

I’ve worked really hard. So here and now I am stating my goals does 2014 health and fitness wise. I want to get in to my healthy BMI range.

I want to lose 50lbs to get there.
And continue to eat better and learn more about nutrition.

I start a 30 day challenge on Jan 15th and expect to lose 8lbs by the end of it. I will update you on my progress and I hope all you readers will all be my cheerleaders ๐Ÿ™‚

I am 202lbs today. I will update with my before picture soon ๐Ÿ˜Š

The Ruin

The Ruin

My feelings hurt
Heart is sore
You tore me apart
Burns from the core
Unprotected I arrived
I let down my shield

I let you in
Now time to heal

I knew then what you would do
I knew my heart would be split in two

What I allowed
Is what you did
I knew it was coming
But all worth the sin

To feel what I felt

I will hold it forever
I will never forget
Forget you never

my mind is blown
From the draft you left
But with you
I would do it all over again

My heart is twisted
My love is tainted
But what a beautiful picture we had painted

Thank you

Original written oct 14 by me ๐Ÿ™‚

Keep the Momentum Alive…

I think allot of people, including myself, look at this time of year so positively… It’s a great place to be mindfully! The slate becomes clean… You feel like ready, charged and powerful!!!

But what happens? Come January 2nd we say “okay! I’ll start tomorrow!” Then by the time you know it tomorrow never comes. Yes, I speak from experience!

I am going to make this blog my documenting source… Maybe this can help me keep the momentum.

This year I will embark on my journey to continue and intensify my weight lose and fitness journey!

Complete 50% of my todo list of things I would like to accomplish.

2014. Let’s Do This!!!! ๐Ÿ™‚

What are your goals!?

I read this today and I love it :

Tomorrow is the first page of a 365 page book. write a good one! Brad paisley – love this

What book will you write? Don’t be shy!

Kony 2012

What is this world coming to? Last week Monday afternoon I finally decided to give 28 minutes of my time to watch this “Kony” video that everyone kept posting about. If you haven’t see it here :

I am absolutely ignorant in regards to wordly matters however in the last year I have definitely tried to be more “informed” and “awake”. So I watch the news and subscibe to various news feeds. Being the completely ignorant person I am after watching the video I was esgaperated by the atrocities going on and that have been going on in Africa which I was totally oblivious to. I felt compelled to share the video immediately on Facebook and Twitter etc. etc…
So the week went on and of course more and more articles start popping up countering/challenging the Kony video… Talking about its simplicity and speaking about the history is deeper than what Kony 2012 portrays. Challenging the group Invisible Children and their intent…accusing them of ill spending…ย  missing the whole point of the video. It is crystal clear to me what the Invisible Children are trying to do. And I am definitely no scholar or rocket scientist. The video is to make people aware, they want Kony to surrender, and if you WANT to you can donate to this “AWARENESS” group.
I am disappointed in the world. Of course we need a little skeptism to bring us down to reality but seriously… Does it really matter what the history of the country is and all other counter arguments brought to the table because does it make it any different that this man, Joseph Kony, is still running this army of children who kill their parents and use girls for sex slaves. The answer is SIMPLE. NO.

So yes I want to help and get rid of Mr. Kony… that is the bottom line!!!! So all you skeptics and devils advocates (for lack of a better term) pick another topic.ย  I dont need a run down of history to show how smart or intricate you writing and thoughts may be. Use your intelligence to help the issue ๐Ÿ™‚
I read this article yesterday where Jedidiah Jenkins responds to about every challenge I have heard to date! I like his answers because they are clear and direct as the questions. There is no skirting the issues in this interview…. Thats my opinion anyway…
‘There’s a Rabid Hunger to Criticize’: A ‘Kony 2012’ Creator Defends the Film –
What are your thoughts?

Enrico D.

One year ago today I received a phone call from my brother. I was in disbelief because I had just seen him and his friend Eric play soccer the night before. My brother said in a mute tone “my friend Eric died” …. The breath was removed from my body. I immediately became angry because I thought he was joking as my brother likes to do but I thought he was crossing the line with this one… But before I could say anything I heard him crying. A sadness fell over me and cloaked me. I couldnt think or speak. I just surrendered to the tears. The tears lasted for many days.
I didn’t know Eric that well but I felt on the instant of meeting him that he was one in a million. He was sweet and gentle. He was my brothers greatest friend from childhood and that alone made me so sad. They spent almost everyday together. How to deal with losing someone so close to you! And someone so wonderful at that. There is no perfect way.
Eric lived his life by showing people by example that there are wonderful people in this world. Eric’s life taught me to appreciate every moment with those you love. Hang on to and cherish every laugh, every smile and everyday you have with those you love because you never know when our creator will call them to come home. We are here on this earth to enjoy each other, teach each other.
Never lose sight ~ Don’t Blink.

Eric’s favourite song I’m told. How appropriate.

Rest in Peace Erico ~ you are an angel and guide in heaven. You are greatly missed even by those you may never thought you touched.


My prayers and thoughts are with Enrico’s family everyday and especially today. One year later from Enrico’s departure. Xo.

I found the below last year… How beautifulโ€ฆ

โ€œYou can shed tears that he is gone,
or you can smile because he has lived.

You can close your eyes and pray that heโ€™ll come back, or you can open your eyes and see all heโ€™s left.

Your heart can be empty because you canโ€™t see him, or you can be full of the love you shared.

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday, or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.

You can remember her only that he is gone, or you can cherish his memory and let it live on.

You can cry and close your mind,
be empty and turn your back.
Or you can do what heโ€™d want:
smile, open your eyes, love and go on”
David Harkins quotes (British Poet and Painter b.1958)

“Good Hearted” Advice

“Your holding her too much”, “She’s getting used to you holding her”, “hold her like this when you feed her”, “give her gripe water” ….. The list of unsolicited advice goes on forever and ever. Next time I meet a new mom I will remember to put my ” filter” on. Everywhere I go, No matter what I do as soon as people know or see that I have a baby they all of a sudden start spitting out advice like vomit. Its projectile, offensive and leaves a bad taste in my mouth. If I dont ask then I am comfortable with whatever it is that I am doing so there is no need for you to offer your thoughts or
correction notes. Because what your really doing to a new mom is shattering her self esteem… Making that mom feel unsure and she questions herself. As if being a mom isnt hard enough.
I want to ask these these underpaid, over qualified experts where they got their degree because as far as I know child rearing is an open ended course that goes on for life and that no one graduates from… Particularly because its an ongoing, continuing education course, where the content changes with time and often has an infinite amount of variables and changes with each senerio and child.

… If I wasn’t insecure being a first time mom then any ounce of confidence I had would be chopped up like a chick from any of the texas chainsaw massacre renditions. And for those of you who have never seen Texas Chainsaw Massacre… Well it is raw and torturous.
From the soap I use to wash my baby’s clothes to how I feed my baby I feel like a jury has convicted me of incompetency. I would like to ask: “what is it you think I am doing the other 6 days of the week when your not around to tell me how I should wipe my daughters bottom?”

The truth of the matter is that this so called “good hearted” advice will always be offered and cant run from it. So my message to all new moms is to stay cool. Your doing fine. Your baby loves you no matter what you wash their clothes with. The only people you need to listen to is yourself and most importantly your baby ๐Ÿ™‚ Relax and Enjoy!

This smile tells me I am doing a great job ๐Ÿ™‚


One day….

So I am just watching Anderson. One of my new favourites since being at home. A portion of the show was about “is your house making you fat?”. A dietician was on the show and talked about the way you can set up your home to help reshape your “diet”. I have read many books, websites, articles, and the list goes on… All the tips the dietician named were among the common tips listed in all of the other documents … Honestly I think it’s funny how everytime I watch, or read something on diets or weightloss I think I will come across a magic ingredient or magic piece of info that is going to help me!!! Ha! No matter how many times I read the same great tips, I still go in to my kitchen and grab some chips, or something else that is not so good for me. I say “hmmm, that is great idea… Let me go get some chips to snack on while I ponder that great tip…”. Then I get so deep in thought and in to my bag of chips that I forget what I was thinking about until I hear or read about it again. Lol. Yes and there it is… I will be ready one day to follow… Hmmm l am going to get some chips and ponder about when and how I should start… ๐Ÿ™‚