“Your holding her too much”, “She’s getting used to you holding her”, “hold her like this when you feed her”, “give her gripe water” ….. The list of unsolicited advice goes on forever and ever. Next time I meet a new mom I will remember to put my ” filter” on. Everywhere I go, No matter what I do as soon as people know or see that I have a baby they all of a sudden start spitting out advice like vomit. Its projectile, offensive and leaves a bad taste in my mouth. If I dont ask then I am comfortable with whatever it is that I am doing so there is no need for you to offer your thoughts or
correction notes. Because what your really doing to a new mom is shattering her self esteem… Making that mom feel unsure and she questions herself. As if being a mom isnt hard enough.
I want to ask these these underpaid, over qualified experts where they got their degree because as far as I know child rearing is an open ended course that goes on for life and that no one graduates from… Particularly because its an ongoing, continuing education course, where the content changes with time and often has an infinite amount of variables and changes with each senerio and child.
… If I wasn’t insecure being a first time mom then any ounce of confidence I had would be chopped up like a chick from any of the texas chainsaw massacre renditions. And for those of you who have never seen Texas Chainsaw Massacre… Well it is raw and torturous.
From the soap I use to wash my baby’s clothes to how I feed my baby I feel like a jury has convicted me of incompetency. I would like to ask: “what is it you think I am doing the other 6 days of the week when your not around to tell me how I should wipe my daughters bottom?”
The truth of the matter is that this so called “good hearted” advice will always be offered and cant run from it. So my message to all new moms is to stay cool. Your doing fine. Your baby loves you no matter what you wash their clothes with. The only people you need to listen to is yourself and most importantly your baby 🙂 Relax and Enjoy!
This smile tells me I am doing a great job 🙂